Somehow I'm neither here nor there
I’ve been having this weird sensation lately. Sometimes more than others… it’s been happening for a while now. It starts in my stomach… it almost feels like falling.
When I was on the subway platform today I felt the drop… but this time I identified the source.
This feeling makes me uneasy… but acknowledging it seems like a good thing.
Have you ever rushed off of a train and started walking down an empty platform as the train is pulling out of the station? It starts to move slowly in the same direction as you… it picks up speed… the cars are rushing past… then suddenly the last car passes you… the blurred wall of the cars isn’t there anymore… a moment of vertigo… you’re alone… there’s a wide-open space to your side and straight ahead…
There are a lot of options when you’re alone on the platform.
You can run to the end of the platform after the train and watch the lights as they disappear into the tunnel wishing you were back on the train… the train is just doing its job... moving on to the next station to pick up another passenger like yourself…
You can get on the next train.. identical to the first.. take it to the next station.. rinse and repeat..
Or you can say “fuck it”, get out of the station and walk around a little... you know you’ll take a train again someday… but all you really need is your own two legs to get you where you’re going.
When I was on the subway platform today I felt the drop… but this time I identified the source.
This feeling makes me uneasy… but acknowledging it seems like a good thing.
Have you ever rushed off of a train and started walking down an empty platform as the train is pulling out of the station? It starts to move slowly in the same direction as you… it picks up speed… the cars are rushing past… then suddenly the last car passes you… the blurred wall of the cars isn’t there anymore… a moment of vertigo… you’re alone… there’s a wide-open space to your side and straight ahead…
There are a lot of options when you’re alone on the platform.
You can run to the end of the platform after the train and watch the lights as they disappear into the tunnel wishing you were back on the train… the train is just doing its job... moving on to the next station to pick up another passenger like yourself…
You can get on the next train.. identical to the first.. take it to the next station.. rinse and repeat..
Or you can say “fuck it”, get out of the station and walk around a little... you know you’ll take a train again someday… but all you really need is your own two legs to get you where you’re going.
posted by Paul at 11:47 AM
4 Comments:
Hypoglycemia?
Perhaps.. Should I have one of Foxy's breakfast cupcakes prior to my commute?? ;-)
no one ever went wrong w/a cupcake.
i like u. i miss ny subways and subway stations. i used to have a feeling too whenever i was in either, it was a boner. of course i was in my teens and early twenties, so that wasnt a rare occurrence. there was something so transient and unperdictable about a train full of strangers all going towards a similar path... Hard On.
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